Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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