So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize