So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Randomize
