i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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