boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
