I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
