Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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