one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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