yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Randomize
