He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
