On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
