Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
