My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
