That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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