feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
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