My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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