Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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