I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
