Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
