i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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