I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
