before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
