Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
