Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
