There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize