There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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