I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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