problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
