He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
