Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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