We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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