You're completely useless in the revolution.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
