biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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