I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
