I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
