the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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