Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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