So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i would punch a child for taco bell
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
