There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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