You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
The air was thick with penises
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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