How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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