'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize