i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Randomize
