is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
