We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
We had sex on a dog bed..
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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