Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
