Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
