I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
