Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
