she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
