dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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